September 2007 Newsletter

Denise Roy’s Ezine Newsletter

http://www.deniseroy.com

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SEPTEMBER 2007

This Month's Essay: "Voice Lessons"

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MOMFULNESS NEWS

My book, "Momfulness: Mothering with Mindfulness,

Compassion, and Grace" was just named one of the Best

Spiritual Books of 2007 by Spirituality and Practice

(one of my favorite websites). They had also named my

previous book, "My Monastery Is a Minivan," as one

of the Best Spiritual Books of 2001. To read more,

visit their website at:

http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/books/features.php?id=17202

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SEMINARS THIS WEEK

For those of you in the SF Bay Area, I'd like to

invite you to a couple of events:

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 7 - 9 pm

An Evening with Denise Roy:

Momfulness: Mothering with Mindfulness, Compassion & Grace

Adobe Lodge, Santa Clara University campus

cost: $10 advance/ $15 at door

RSVP at SCU Alumni Office: 408-554-6800

http://www.scu.edu/Alumni/invites/momfulness9.07.pdf

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 30, 1 – 4 pm

Momfulness: Mothering with Mindfulness, Compassion & Grace

Reflections on Mothering in all its forms

Mercy Center in Burlingame, CA

cost: $25 To register, call 650.340.7474 or go online at:

http://www.mercy-center.org/Flyers_2007/09_30Momfulness/momfulness.htm

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ESSAY

VOICE LESSONS

by Denise Roy

http://www.deniseroy.com

"...let us always be kind in this world."

 —Natalie Goldberg

I am sitting at my kitchen table, drinking coffee from

my favorite mug. My notebook is in front of me, and I

am doing writing practice before I read the newspaper

or check my email. I begin by listening to an audiotape

of author Natalie Goldberg; she is reading from her

wonderful book, "Writing Down the Bones."

Even though Natalie is not with me in person, I feel

as if I have a friend in my kitchen, a coffee buddy.

Her voice an alive thing — there is a quality that

comes through it that amazes me. It is not only her

words — what she is saying — but it is also her tone,

and the silence that surrounds her words. It is the

smile that comes through along with her passion. It

is her humor and delight, as if she is happiest

right now just talking with her listeners, talking

about what she loves.

The quality of her voice reflects the fact that she

has meditated for decades. She has a depth of

compassion for herself that is the wellspring of

her compassion for others. The sound of her voice

helps me find my own voice on this morning. I begin

to write.

Then the telephone rings. It is my mother. Her

voice sounds plaintive and sad. She is looking

for a direction to her day, hoping for an

invitation or for some news of what is happening

in her children's lives. She keeps asking me

questions, and in that moment, I am only aware

of being irritated at being disturbed. I push

her away, and cut our conversation short.

After I hang up, I turn on the tape again. I

hear Natalie's kind voice, and then I realize

the message I had sent to my mom: "Don’t bother

me. I don’t have time for you."

I decide to call my mother back. I feel my voice

soften. I realize that when I call my own sons,

who are now living on their own, I often ask too

many questions, and I can feel them pull away.

My compassion for my mom returns. "Would you

like to come to dinner?" I ask. I know that

this visit will be an anchor for her day.

"I’d love to" she says. She adds, "Thank you.

You’ve saved me from sausage and sauerkraut."

I hang up, and turn my tape player back on,

and I thank Natalie for the lesson in finding

my voice. She responds:

"The deepest secret in our heart of hearts is

that we are writing because we love the world,

and why not finally carry that secret out with

our bodies into the living rooms and porches,

backyards and grocery stores? Let the whole

thing flower: the poem and the person writing

the poem. And let us always be kind in this world."

PRACTICE: Today, listen to what comes through

your voice as you speak to your children, to a

parent, to a co-worker, to yourself.

What do you hear in your voice?

Can you let kindness come through?

blessings & peace,

Denise Roy

© 2007 Denise Roy. All rights reserved.

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Denise Roy, LMFT, M.Div., is an author, a licensed

marriage and family therapist, a popular speaker,

and a mother of five. Her books and audiotapes

include "Momfulness: Mothering with Mindfulness,

Compassion, and Grace" (Jossey-Bass, 2007),

"My Monastery Is a Minivan" (Loyola Press, 2001) and

"Meditations for Mothers” (Random House Audiobook, 2007).

Her essays have also been included in these books:

Your Children Will Raise You; I Like Being a Mom;

The Miracle of Sons; Spiritual Surrender; and

Humor for a Mom's Heart.

Denise and her husband live in the San Francisco Bay area;

they have three grown sons, an 12-year-old daughter, and

an 18-year-old foster daughter from Iran.

For more information, please contact her at

mailto:denise@deniseroy.com and visit her Web site at

http://www.DeniseRoy.com.

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You can order a copy of Denise’s books/CDs on Amazon or

from your local bookstore:

"MOMFULNESS: Mothering with Mindfulness,Compassion, and Grace":

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0787981974/familyspirit-20

"Momfulness is a blessing and a prayer -- The way to wholeness is

in these pages." - Christiane Northrup, MD, author of Mother-Daughter

Wisdom, and Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom

"Meditations for Mothers: Adapted from Momfulness"

http://www.amazon.com/Meditations-Mothers-Adapted-MOMFULNESS-Denise/dp/0739342681/ref=ed_oe_a/103-6342371-6747857?ie=UTF8&qid=1166051023&sr=1-2

"My Monastery Is a Minivan":

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0829416870/familyspirit-20

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Denise speaks at schools, churches, conferences and

community organizations both locally and nationally.

If you are interested in more information for your group,

please email her at mailto:denise@deniseroy.com

You can view some possible topics at:

http://deniseroy.com/events.htm

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